Apparent Submission
by Taidhe
Summary: Heero and Duo get in a big fight, mostly just Heero explaining his side to Wufei. Language warning, no apparent pairings.


Heero walked stiffly into the campus gym and over to the punching bag. Warily, he looked around. No one was watching over-carefully. Good.  
  
*thud*  
  
bastard  
  
*thud* *thud* *thud*  
  
unfeeling insensitive BASTARD  
  
*thud* *thudthudthud*  
  
Die. Die and ROT IN HELL  
  
"Something wrong, Yuy?" Wufei materialized next to the bag he was venting on. Heero nearly turned and vented on _him_.  
  
"No."  
  
*thud* *whap* *smack*  
  
"Of course. You come in and destroy our equipment everyday after all. It is not like you don't keep your own exercise gear in your room."  
  
"Shut up Chang."  
  
*thud* *thud* *whiff*  
  
"Chang, give back the punching bag."  
  
"Not yet."  
  
"Now."  
  
"Not until you tell me what riled you."  
  
"Maxwell."  
  
"Duh, if I may be so crass. I want details."  
  
"Long story."  
  
"My classes are done for today."  
  
"Not here."  
  
"We have legs. We can move elsewhere."  
  
"Like?"  
  
"I have a single dorm. Shower, change, and meet me there in ten minutes." Chang turned and sauntered infuriatingly away. Damn him. To go or not to go? He won't drop it. He *will* bring it up at inopportune moments. Better go. Heero turned away as well, toward the shower rooms. Only Chang would notice I can shower, change, and be across campus in under ten minutes. Heero noted with something akin to a sigh. He watches me *way* to closely. He watches *all* of us too closely.  
  
* * *  
  
Heero stomped angrily up the steps of Wufei's dorm housing, up the stairs, and threw open his door. Wufei calmly looked up from his lotus position on the bed.  
  
"Well?" Heero demanded.  
  
"Tell me how Maxwell made you mad."  
  
"It's nothing big and it won't interfere with our mission."  
  
"Translation: It's stupid. And you never let *anything* interfere with our mission. If it was something that big, one of you would currently be packing." Wufei unfolded his legs and gestured for Heero to sit down. "I'm not letting this go. Just spit it out, man." Heero grunted and complied. Fine. Busybody.  
  
"Look, it *is* stupid. Duo is on my case for being too obedient."  
  
[ "Hey Heero! What's up? Wanna go play basketball with me and a couple of guys?" Duo bounced into their room and flopped down on his bed.  
  
"I'm typing up the mission report. I can't, it's due in an hour. Maybe I'll ome out later when it's done." Heero replied automatically. I've gotta get this out fast  
  
"So come out and play anyway. No biggie if it's a little late, right? They'll just have to deal with it."  
  
"Duo. It's due soon. Just let me finish it."  
  
"Heero! Come on! They handle much tougher things than a late mission report every day. It'll be fine. Everyone's gotta go home soon, it's the last chance of the day. And we need you to even things out."  
  
"Sorry Duo. Tommorrow then, if there's no mission, ok?" Heero tried to placate Duo.  
  
"Mission this, Mission that. Lighten up! They order your life around and you never say boo! You're like a fawning little puppy, doing everything they say without question. Shove over, Look around, and Grow up already! You don't have to do everything they say!" Duo exploded. Heero was taken aback by the vehemence in his voice - it really wasn't that big a deal.  
  
"Later Duo. I'm going to finish this now."  
  
Duo stomped out.  
  
  
  
"Hey Heero! Let's get this!" Duo pointed eagerly to a leather jacket in a shop window on the street. They were looking for mission clothes for an infiltration.  
  
"It'll be noticed on the credit card we stole. Look for something cheaper." Heero reasoned.  
  
"Oh, come on! Their gonna notice we're using it eventually anyway- we won't get caught. We never do."  
  
"Duo, no. We need the mission safetly, and Professor J warned me last time anyway. Our expenses have been getting to expensive, and we're being noticed."  
  
"There you go again. 'Professor said.' 'Mission requires.' Get your own goddam life already! So what if so-and-so isn't happy! They can't do anything to you! Heero! Rebel a little. It would be good for you."  
  
Duo stomped off again.  
  
  
  
"Duo, you need to be more careful with Deathscythe. The repairs for it have been on the ridiculous side lately." Heero approached Duo reasonably. Duo looked at Heero suspiciously.  
  
"You didn't come to me on your own, did you." It was an accusation, not a question.  
  
"No, actually, J and G asked me to talk to you." Heero replied equably.  
  
"Them again! Telling you what to do, again! And you trotting off like an obedient little pet, again! You are *not* their slave Heero! You never will be! I'm worried about you, you know. This will all be over, you'll be on your own, and the first bossy person who comes along will own you! You don't know how to cope without someone giving you orders! JUST FUCKING LISTEN TO *YOURSELF* INSTEAD OF _THEM_ FOR ONCE IN YOUR FUCKING LIFE!!!!!!!!"  
  
Heero was so mad he couldn't see. He left for the gym.  
  
  
  
"And you were rage-filled because?" Wufei asked suspiciously. Maxwell was out-of-line, possibly, but it normally took a hell of a lot more to piss off Yuy.  
  
"Because Duo has decided I'm a will-less slave with a façade of independence. It never occurs to him the obedience is the façade, not my free will. Because he's doing what he accuses other's of- ordering me around like a slave. And it perversely frustrates him when I don't comply. There's two main points why I WON'T listen to him on this.  
  
A) Duo is not my keeper, my parent, or my boss. We are equals. I let him function without complaint the way he does, which is often needlessly rebellious and dangerous. It's the way he works best and I respect that. However, that will not work for me. I'm not going to change my whole mode of function because Duo has a problem with it, and he has to just deal with that." Heero took a deep breath, while Wufei waited silently. "The second reason is- he just doesn't get it. I'm not mindlessly obeying their every whim. I'm looking at what they want, what I want, and what happens when those two things don't coincide. So far, I'm choosing the easiest path. I have more freedom when they think I'm totally under control. Duo can't understand that. I *will* *not* show apparent submission for the rest of my life, I'm just biding my time."  
  
"You mean like that guy in Trigun, Knives." Wufei interrupted carefully. "By cutting his own hair, he was demonstrating an act of total, complete mutiny. He didn't do anything half-way- it was total or not at all. You are waiting in the same way, until you can leave the Professors completely?"  
  
"Exactly. I'm not going to disappear just yet. But when I do, I won't ever come back." Heero said with relief. Such verbage was not his procedure.  
  
"But still." Wufei continued, "He may have a point. You can't submit to someone's every whim for so many years without that becoming at least partially real. It's not possible. If you get so used to obeying, it may be too hard to break away."  
  
Heero stood up. You can't understand. *Apparent* submission. Submission is always of the mind and heart, a choice, no matter what shows on the outside. Chang, you are not as wise as some believe. Maybe someday. Heero bowed carefully and turned, an icy deadpan on his face the whole while.  
  
"Ja."  
  
The door closed silently behind him. Wufei went back to meditating, showing no sign that he cared or even realized the difference between slavery and apparent submission.  
  
  
  
Author's Note: I liked this better when it was in my head. I hope it reads better than I think. any comments are welcome. You know I have yet to get *any* commentary on my fics from *anywhere*? I wonder if anybody's even reading. 


End file.
